Virtually in Love Page 16

  You had your chance, that evil little voice inside of me piped up. It could’ve been you. But you blew it.

  Good point, evil little voice. Taking a deep breath, I managed to shoot Trevor what I hoped was a pleasant and relatively sane smile. “Want to sit down while we wait for Jon?”

  “Sure.” He followed me into the living room. For the first time, I noticed he looked amazing in a dark suit jacket over jeans and a concert T-shirt. Very rock ’n’ roll, Kaz might have said. For a second I felt a shiver of the old feelings creep back.

  But that wasn’t real. It was just a fantasy, like the song I’d thought was predicting my future. Kaz? Now that was real. Or it could be if it wasn’t already too late.

  “So,” Trevor said after what I realized was an awkwardly long moment of silence. He was sitting on the edge of the sofa holding his cell phone, tossing it back and forth from one hand to the other. “This should be fun. The dance, I mean.”

  “Yeah.” I glanced toward the hall, wishing Jon would hurry up.

  Trevor seemed to be thinking the same thing. “I’ll go see what’s keeping him,” he said. “Be right back.”

  Dropping his phone onto the coffee table, he took off. I leaned back in my chair, feeling oddly drained, even though the evening hadn’t even started yet. How the heck was I going to pull this off? How was I going to smile and flirt and dance with Trevor, when all I could think about was Kaz?

  Before I could figure it out, Trevor’s phone rang. It only took a second to recognize the tune—a recent hit called “Fun Girl.” Curious in spite of myself, I leaned forward so I could see the readout. It was a call from someone named Z.

  Zoe, I realized. I glanced toward the hall, wondering if Trevor would want me to answer it. Before I could decide, he hurried in and grabbed the phone himself, glancing at the display.

  “Zoe?” he said, answering. “Hang on a sec, okay?”

  He lowered the phone and smiled at me. “Jon’s on his phone in your bathroom,” he said. “He’s fighting with Shelly again, I think.” He held up his own phone. “Mind if I take this while we wait?”

  “Go ahead.” I wandered out into the hall to give him some privacy. Twenty-four hours ago I probably would have been fighting back jealousy at a call from Zoe. And maybe I would have been right to feel that way. Because looking back, it was pretty obvious he thought she was something special. And maybe not just in a talented-drummer kind of way.

  It was weird to realize I didn’t care. So what if Trevor and Zoe liked each other? More power to them. Maybe they’d end up being the perfect couple.

  Like me and Kaz . . .

  Suddenly Trevor’s voice grew loud enough to carry into the hallway. “I can’t do it, seriously,” he exclaimed. “I told you, she asked me to this, like, two weeks ago, and if I bag out now . . .” There was a pause. I crept closer to the doorway, unable to resist listening. “Look, don’t be like that, Zoe,” he said after a moment, his voice softening. “You know it’s not like that. When I get back . . .” Another pause. “Look, I can’t help it. I’m sure they’ll want us again, right? Anyway, I have to go. I’ll text you later.”

  I scooted across to the front door, pretending to be looking out the little window beside it when he emerged into the foyer. “Everything okay?” I asked.

  “Sure.” He looked troubled. “I mean, yeah, definitely. It turns out they want us at that club I was telling you about.”

  “The Scene?” I exclaimed. “Really? That’s amazing, Trevor! Congratulations.”

  “Yeah.” He didn’t look happy. “The thing is, there was a cancellation tonight. They wanted us to step in for the ten-o’clock show.”

  “Tonight?”

  “Uh-huh.” He slumped against the wall, staring at his phone. “Talk about bad timing . . . .”

  Yeah. Or was it?

  “Hold on,” I said. “Ten o’clock? But it’s barely seven now.”

  “Yeah. So?” He shrugged.

  “So you could still make it.” Crossing the foyer in two big strides, I grabbed his hand. “You can’t pass up this break, Trev. And it sounds like Jon’s not in the mood for the dance anyway. Why not see if he can run you back there right now?”

  “What?” He stared at me, perplexed. “But your dance—I can’t bail on you, Chloe. That wouldn’t be cool.”

  “Who needs moonlight and red roses and fancy dinners anyway?” I said. “I’d rather just order random food at the diner with . . .”

  My voice trailed off with a wince as I thought about Kaz. If Trevor hadn’t come to town at just the right—or wrong?—time, I’d probably be at the dance with Kaz right now. And suddenly I knew that’s what I really wanted. To be with Kaz.

  Trevor furrowed his eyebrows, waiting for me to finish, but instead I quickly blurted out, “Seriously, I don’t mind. This week has been fun, Trevor. It’s been great getting to know you again after all these years, and I hope we’ll totally stay friends from now on. But . . .”

  “Hang on.” He tilted his head, staring at me. “Are you . . . breaking up with me?”

  “I don’t know.” I shrugged sheepishly. “Maybe. I mean, were we even officially going out?”

  “I don’t know.” He looked more confused than ever. “I never really thought about it, I guess.”

  Typical guy, I thought with a tiny smile. “Well, I have,” I told him. “And the thing is, I think we’re better as friends. Especially since I think there might be someone else you like for real.”

  He frowned. “What are you talking about?”

  “Zoe. Duh.” I rolled my eyes. “Could you possibly talk about her even more, dude? Anyone can tell you’re twitterpated.”

  “Twitter-what?” He was still frowning. “Anyway, Zoe and I are just friends. Nothing more.”

  “I know, I know, you keep telling me that.” I poked him in the chest. “Face it, Trev. She’s your Yoko.”

  He looked alarmed. “No way! I won’t let this break up the band.”

  I laughed. “Way to be Mr. Literal. I just mean I think it makes more sense for you to be with someone, you know, in the same area code. And for me, too.”

  “Oh.” He still looked wary for a second. Then his expression cleared. “Wait. Is this about that guy?”

  “What guy?”

  “Your buddy Kaz.” He took a step closer. “I could tell he was into you.”

  “Maybe he used to be,” I said softly, thinking about him and Vanessa at the dance. “I’m not so sure anymore.” I forced a smile. “But never mind that—you’ll need to hit the road now if you’re going to make that show. I mean, I know it’s totally rock ’n’ roll to show up late, but there are limits.”

  He stared at me, his expression wavering between excitement and uncertainty. At that moment Jon crashed into the room.

  “Women,” he spat out. “They suck.” Glancing at me, he added, “No offense.”

  “Does this mean you’re not going to the dance?” I asked him.

  He just shrugged. “I can still drop you two off, I guess,” he muttered sourly.

  I smiled at Trevor. “I have a better idea . . . .”

  Five minutes later they were gone. Trevor had thanked me about eleventy zillion times in those five minutes, still seeming a little shell-shocked.

  But he’d get over it by the time he made it back to his own town. I was sure of it. Would he and Zoe end up together? Yeah, I was pretty sure of that, too.

  So where did that leave me?

  Chapter Nineteen

  I’m not sure how long I wandered around my house trying to figure out what to do next. Should I still go to the dance? It was tempting. But I didn’t want to be at the center of some pity party.

  Still, I couldn’t just not show up, either. Digging my cell phone out of my purse, I clicked open a group text to Kaz and Vanessa.

  Then I stopped, not sure what to say. Especially when I pictured Kaz—sweet, goofy Kaz—asking me to the dance. And playing the oboe outside my window. And grinning
hopefully as he waited for me to break his heart.

  With a grimace, I deleted the group text. Instead I started a text to just Vanessa.

  Probably won’t make the dance after all. Tell u more later. Have fun!

  I added a smiley emoji at the end and then clicked send. Then I waited, sure Vanessa would text back immediately with follow-up questions. But a minute or two passed, and my phone stayed silent.

  Finally I shrugged and tossed the phone aside. Maybe Vanessa was having such a good time with Kaz that she’d turned off her phone. Or maybe it was sitting in her purse in a dark corner somewhere while the two of them danced the night away, wrapped in each other’s arms . . . .

  I squeezed my eyes shut, banishing the image. What was the point in torturing myself? Either Kaz and Vanessa would fall in love or they wouldn’t. I wasn’t going to interfere, even now that I’d finally woken up and realized Kaz and I had been the ones who were meant to be all along. If “meant to be” was even a thing, that is.

  “Stupid song,” I muttered as a snippet of “True Romance” danced unbidden through my brain. Now the familiar lyrics seemed to taunt me, remind me of everything I couldn’t have.

  I wandered into the living room, flopping down on the couch without bothering to turn on the lights. Staring into space, I wondered if I’d been stupid to ever believe in true romance. Maybe there was no such thing. At least not the version from that song.

  And because I’d believed in some hokey version of true romance, Kaz was with Vanessa now. What if they did fall in love tonight? Stranger things had happened. They were probably the two most amazing people in the world—kind, funny, creative, tons of fun to be around. If they became a couple, I’d have to settle for a front-seat view of their happiness.

  I played with a loose thread on the couch cover, trying to banish “True Romance” from my head, but it refused to go. Every line seemed to remind me of how badly I’d messed up.

  When you know it’s right, it’s time to declare.

  Make it a memory you two will always share . . . .

  I’d been waiting for Trevor to make some kind of big declaration of love. While I’d been waiting, Kaz had been the one who’d pretty much come out and told me he wanted to be more than friends. Only I hadn’t really been listening.

  I knew my dreams of true romance would all come true someday.

  Like dinner and a movie out with my most special bae . . . .

  Okay, so Trevor and I had had fun that night at the movies. But how had I missed that I had even more fun every time I hung out with Kaz, no matter what we were doing? And that it had been that way for as long as I’d known him?

  And then there was the biggie:

  You’ll know it’s true on a magical night,

  Whether sailing at sea or dancing in the moonlight.

  That’s when you’ll share a first kiss if you dare.

  Remember it always: true romance is rare.

  Why had I pinned all my hopes on one magical night? That was stupid. Romance wasn’t about a single night, moonlit or otherwise. It wasn’t even about a special first kiss. No, now I could see it was much bigger than that gooey movie stuff. It was about being comfortable together, being able to count on each other, being happier when you were together than when you were apart. Like friends, but even a tiny bit better than that.

  “Like me and Kaz,” I whispered.

  As the thoughts and memories tumbled through my head, the song’s insanely catchy chorus kept dancing along behind all the rest:

  True romance. It’s the air that we breathe. Just us two together. Yeah, just you and me.

  True romance. It’s the air that we breathe. Just us two

  together. Yeah, just you and me.

  True romance. It’s the air that we breathe. Just us two

  together. Yeah, just you and me . . . .

  “Stop it!” I exclaimed aloud, pressing both hands over my ears.

  That didn’t help, so I turned on the TV, punching in one of the satellite music channels. As I surfed around, looking for a song that might be catchy enough to overcome the racket in my head, I heard something outside.

  Was that the sound of a car stopping in front of the house? I switched the TV off again, listening. It was too early for my family to be back already, wasn’t it? Then again, Timothy sometimes got carsick, especially when he was excited . . . .

  I dropped the remote and bolted for the stairs, not ready to face my family—or anyone else—just yet. When I was safely in my room, I shut the door and collapsed against it. Whew! With any luck, they wouldn’t even notice I was home.

  Holding my breath, I listened for the sound of the door opening downstairs. Instead I heard something else from the direction of the front yard.

  I blinked, tilting my head and focusing that way. It sounded like someone was out there under my windows. Was that a giggle?

  Yes, definitely a giggle. Followed by . . . the soft toot of a trumpet warming up?

  Letting out the breath I’d been holding, I headed for the window to see what was going on out there.

  Chapter Twenty

  It was Kaz. Of course.

  When I opened the window, he grinned up at me. “Oh man,” he told the people gathered around him. “We’re busted.”

  “I told you to be quieter,” Vanessa chided Dave, the talkative percussionist, who was holding an acoustic guitar under his arm.

  I leaned out, not sure what to think. “What are you guys doing down there?”

  “Serenading you—duh,” a guy from the band—a trombone player named Adam—said loudly. He looked spiffy in his fancy clothes. So did all the others. Dave the percussionist. Cody the sax player. Sophie the French horn player. A couple of others I couldn’t see clearly in the dark. And of course, Kaz and Vanessa in their Gatsby getups.

  “Ready, guys?” Kaz lifted his trumpet to his lips. “One, two, three . . .”

  They all started to play. It was a little raggedy and off tempo at first. But after a few bars, I recognized the tune.

  I should. It was the one that had been running through my head for the past half hour.

  “‘True Romance,’” I blurted out in amazement. But Kaz didn’t even like that song! Still, there he was, tootling away at the familiar melody.

  Okay, this was too weird. I had to figure out what they were up to, what was going on. How had they even known I was here? For all Vanessa could guess from that text I’d sent, I might have run off somewhere with Trevor.

  “Be right down!” I called out the window.

  I wasn’t sure whether they could hear me over their own playing. But it didn’t matter. I raced for the stairs.

  Moments later I burst out through the front door. They were just wrapping up the first chorus by then. When he saw me, Kaz stopped playing and grinned.

  “Hey,” he said.

  The others trailed off too, though Cody continued with enthusiasm through the end of the next verse until Dave finally stopped him by yanking the saxophone away from his mouth.

  But I wasn’t paying attention to that. I was watching Kaz and Vanessa as they came toward me.

  “Are you okay?” Vanessa asked. “When I got your text, I was kind of worried.”

  Kaz nodded. “But just then Maya came by talking about how Jon Whatsisface’s girlfriend was all freaking out about him blowing her off and leaving town or something.”

  “And we kind of figured things out from there,” Vanessa finished. She grabbed both my hands and squeezed them. “Are you okay, Chloe?”

  “I’m fine.” I forced a smile. “He’s not worth getting upset about. I can see that now.”

  “Really?” Kaz stepped forward, looking interested. “Because my offer still stands. You know—if you still want to go to the dance with me? I know I’m not any kind of rock god, but . . .”

  “I couldn’t,” I said quickly. “You and Vanessa—”

  “Are just friends,” Vanessa finished for me with a smile. “We both knew that
all along. We just didn’t have the heart to tell you.”

  “Yeah,” Dave put in from a few yards away, where the others were all standing around, pretending not to listen. “Plus Kaz was probably hoping you’d get jealous if you saw him with another woman, Chloe.”

  “Shut up, Dave,” Kaz said quickly.

  “Even if that other woman was just, you know, Vanessa,” Dave continued.

  “Shut up, Dave,” Vanessa said with a laugh. She turned to me. “Seriously, Chloe. You were obviously feeling so guilty about turning Kaz down, I might have exaggerated things a little. So you wouldn’t worry about him and ruin your big date with Trevor.”

  I stared at her, taking that in. Then I turned to stare at Kaz. What was that expression on his face? I’d only seen it once before. But if he was embarrassed by what Dave had said, did that mean . . . Could it mean it was true?

  “Go to the dance with Kaz, Chloe,” Vanessa urged, sincerity and hope shining out of her wide blue eyes. “Seriously. I don’t mind at all.” She giggled. “Actually, I might be kind of mad at you if you don’t go.”

  “Chloe and Kaz sittin’ in a tree,” Cody sang softly.

  “Would you guys please shut up?” Kaz said to Cody and Dave, who grinned at each other and high-fived. Then he turned back to me. “So what do you say, Chloe? Want to give this another try?”

  I hesitated. Part of me wanted to say yes. A big part. Especially now that I realized I should have said yes from the start.

  But I wasn’t sure I could do it. How could I face the whole school after making such a fool of myself over Trevor? After practically forcing my two best friends to go out together? After being so generally clueless about anything having to do with romance, true or otherwise?

  Kaz watched my face carefully. After a second he held out his hand.

  “Or maybe we don’t have to go back,” he said. “Maybe we could have our own dance right here.” He snapped his fingers. “Maestro?”

  Sophie started to play “True Romance” again, and after a few notes the others joined in. Kaz smiled at me, his hand still outstretched.